Parody of Magic (Single)

[Intro] (Instrumental mimics "Magic" with a quirky synth twist) [Verse 1] Hey, I’m here to blow your mind like a dusty old PC, Got a USB wand and a keyboard full of spells, see? I’ll make your Wi-Fi vanish, then bring it back at 3G, But my router’s stuck buffering—uh-oh, tech tragedy! [Chorus] 'Cause this ain’t magic, no, it’s just a glitch parade, My code’s a mess, and my RAM’s beginnin’ to fade! I tried to hack the cloud, but it started to rain, Now my laptop’s a toaster—man, this is insane! [Verse 2] I pulled a rabbit from my hat, but it’s just a PDF, My “abracadabra” froze up Windows 93! I’ll levitate your smartphone with a rubber-band sling, But Siri just laughed and said, “You can’t do a thing!” [Chorus] This ain’t magic, nah, it’s a Wi-Fi drought, My 5G’s a dial-up—yeah, I figured it out! I hexed my charger, now it’s sparkin’ like Zeus, My whole room’s a blackout—dude, I need a new fuse! [Bridge] (Spoken over kazoo solo) Step right up, I’ll fix your RAM with a paperclip and glue, But my antivirus just quit, and the firewall’s blue! If your hard drive’s cursed, just reboot it twice, Or throw it out the window—hey, that’s my advice! [Outro] (Fade-out with distorted modem sounds and a kazoo hum)