My Personal Hell

Intro: 4 bars instrumental (harmonica or guitar lead) Verse 1 When I was growin' up, I couldn’t play no sports Too truant for the school, always gotta appear for courts When I finally went back, I guess I was too far off track They threw me in OP-ED and said they couldn’t cut me no slack I’d just lost my daddy, man, who gives a f**k about that? All they cared about was school while my whole world cracked Chorus And I ain’t did what I gotta do, no I ain’t got a clue Pickle, if you’re listenin’, wish I could make you proud too Minutes turned to hours, days to weeks and I fell That’s the reason I’m broke, I’m a frog in a well Verse 2 Freshman year, I dropped out, sent my a*s back to OP-ED Thought I saw a chance to graduate, got expelled instead Lost a lot of weight, there’s somethin’ sinister inside They call it a criminal mind, say I can’t be civilized I wish I had a dime for every time I heard that line “Problem with authority,” yeah, they write me off as fine Chorus And I ain’t did what I gotta do, no I ain’t got a clue Pickle, if you’re listenin’, wish I could make you proud too Ten years gone with no enjoyment to tell That’s the reason I’m broke, I’m a frog in a well Verse 3 Now I bust my back on construction, eight years and still reluctant Neighbors locked in fear, I keep us steady with my hands, blunt and constant We remodel walls to keep the heat, fix the sink and stop the leak Replace a beam down in the basement, every payday’s lookin’ bleak It’s overwhelming, ain’t nobody comin’ to help We take L’s upon L’s, buildin’ dreams on top of cracked shelf Break / Solo (8 bars) — harmonica or guitar over E7 groove Bridge (quiet, darker) I’m so full of venom and rage when my pen bleeds on the page Light switch in my brain flips, I let God take the stage I don’t give a shit unless you wanna knuckle up and die But I bet my life on these raps, not on lockin’ up inside Verse 4 (angry, determined) I been tired of buyin’ time while my pockets stay hollow Sick of watchin’ every news show spin another crooked lie they follow What should I do? Go back to school and stop actin’ a fool? Drop all I knew and do somethin’ new, chase a different tool? Rappin’ looks cool but I’m lackin’ the gear, I’m lackin’ the proof I’m lookin’ to you for answers but I’m standin’ on my roof Chorus (repeat, louder) And I ain’t did what I gotta do, no I ain’t got a clue Pickle, if you’re listenin’, wish I could make you proud too All these years of grindin’, still ringin’ the same bell That’s the reason I’m broke, I’m a frog in a well Outro (shout) I’m takin’ charge of the game, don’t give a f**k what you think When I say that’s on, that motherfucker breaks, gone in a blink You had your chance, you blew it, now watch me rise or watch me fall Either way I’ll stand my ground—I’m done apologizin’ at all