Welcome to the service bay

[Verse 1] Clock in, bright lights, dealership zoo, Shiny suits barking orders, nothing new. They sell the dream, I fix the regret, You bought the car, now you're in my net. Paper cuts, coolant burns, fake grin grin, “Your warranty’s void if you breathe again.” Corporate scripts, smile or die, Customer’s crying — and I know why! [Chorus] Welcome to the Service Bay! Where your patience comes to die today! We’ll charge your soul, and tax your pain, Then thank you kindly — come again! [Verse 2] Clipboard kings and service lies, “Diagnostic fee” in your eyes. I push the keys, I sell the truth, While management drinks their fountain of youth. Techs are raging, parts are late, Printer jammed, the system ate My last report — now boss wants heads, Welcome to the land of the half-d**d! [Chorus] Welcome to the Service Bay! Your oil’s clean but your soul’s decayed! Smog and sweat and bills to pay, Yeah, welcome to the Service Bay! [Bridge – shouted, machine-g*n delivery] (HEY!) “Can you check my tire light?” (HEY!) “Can you do it all tonight?” (HEY!) “I just bought it last July!” (HEY!) “And I shouldn’t have to buy—!” //Guitar feedback scream// [Verse 3] New guy smell, like factory sin, HR says “Smile, and pull ‘em in.” They sell the dream, I sell the fix, Same con, just different tricks. Every car’s a coffin shell, Built for payment plans from hell. But I’ll clock out, light one up, Flip the bird and fill my cup! [Final Chorus] Welcome to the Service Bay! Where dreams break down and hopes decay! We’ll torque your life, and drain your pay, Welcome to the Service Bay! [Outro – spoken, sarcastic rant over distortion] “Your car’s ready. Just sign here, and here, and here… Oh — and the survey link’s in your email.” //Exploding feedback, distorted laughter fades out//