The first one screamed

[Intro] They say the first k**l change you. They right. It don’t make you a man… It makes you a ghost. And I been hauntin’ these hills ever since. [Verse 1] Wasn’t for glory, wasn’t for pride, Wasn’t no threat—just a man who lied. Promised bread for the trapline meat, Then pulled that steel from beneath his seat. I was twelve, maybe less, mud on my knees, Fists too small, heart beatin’ in threes. He swung, I ducked, he cursed my name, So I reached for the rust and ended the game. Blade in his gut, stare in his eye, First time I saw a grown man die. He screamed like a hog, squealed and thrashed, Then silence hit harder than the final slash. [chorus] The first one screamed—loud and long, Like the woods was rightin’ what went wrong. He tried to take what fed my kin, So I gave him back to the dark again. *The first one screamed—now I don’t sleep, He visit me sometimes, buried deep. But I’d do it again, cold and mean… ‘Cause I ain’t the boy—I’m the scream. [Verse 2] Dragged his body to the ridge edge slow, Let the coyotes judge what I let go. I ain’t cried since, I don’t feel shame— Just sharpen steel and remember names. Mama asked why the meat come wet, I said, “He ain’t comin’ back, so don’t fret.” She lit a smoke, passed it near, Said, “Good boys die… and you still here.” That night I didn’t eat—I stared at stars, Felt their silence settle deep in scars. Didn’t bury him. Didn’t pray. Just wiped the blade and walked away. [Bridge] He ain’t the last. He wasn’t special. But he was the first… And that scream… It stayed with me. Became part of me. Like the rust. Like the hunger. [chorus] The first one screamed—loud and long, Like the woods was rightin’ what went wrong. He tried to take what fed my kin, So I gave him back to the dark again. *The first one screamed—now I don’t sleep, He visit me sometimes, buried deep. But I’d do it again, cold and mean… ‘Cause I ain’t the boy—I’m the scream. [Outro] They don’t hear it no more. But I do. Every time I close my eyes. That scream… That goddamn scream… Taught me how to live.